Volkshaus: A Kitteh's Perspective

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-10-2011 01:45 PM

My name is Ranger. I live in a house with 2 hoominz who like VAG stuffs. I like VAG stuffs too.

I had recently reached out to MTV for my own reality show, but I was turned down. Something about lolcat racism. I haz Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson on the case. But for now, I makes my own reality thread. Welcome to Volkshaus...let me show you it.

This is me. My hoominz know that I don't take teh chit from anyone. I keeps teh order round here.

I is currently working on my interior dezine degree.

I haz two hoominz. One is a girl and she avoids me because I am not declawed. My other hoomin is a male, and sometimes likes to test my patience. Sometimes, a warning is sufficient.

Other times, I haz to smack a bitch.

Usually after that, it keeps him in line for a while. I gots it like dat.

While I am not disciplining my hoominz, I am outside picking fights and keeping hood kittehs out of my territories. I also make sure teh cars are ok.

The hoominz are always washing cars. Usually they come out nice, but when I am not satisfied, I let them know.

It's time for a nap. I writes more later. :p

**eudorrra** · 06-10-2011 01:52 PM

fffff that explains the cat hair all over my keyboard

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-10-2011 01:58 PM

Yep. And after this, I makes you pan fer gold in teh litter box.

**eudorrra** · 06-10-2011 02:05 PM

no moar sliced giblets for you! which reminds me i need to get more kibbles at Shoprite..

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-10-2011 02:25 PM

Ok...I waits here.

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-11-2011 01:07 PM

Overcast and rain makes for a lazy Caturday. Hoomin is too lazy to do the seatbelt swap in the MK2.

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-11-2011 06:23 PM

After much scratching and tormenting, I finally got the hoomin to get off of his ass and get some work done.

He needed a hand putting in the new seat belts, so I halped.

Amateur.

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-12-2011 11:21 PM

It was quite the busy day today. The hoominz cleared the driveway of one car, installed some mud flaps on the other, and brought the red MK3 back. The red one still haz a slight coolant leak coming from the flange, so I will make sure to avoid licking the puddle.

PS: I have been playing in the mud, so you may want to wash the 20th now.

**NastyJettaNza** · 06-13-2011 07:48 PM

I tried reading this and all I got was "meow meow meow, hiss, spit, meow"

**91JettaMACG** · 06-13-2011 09:20 PM

Originally Posted by NastyJettaNza

I tried reading this and all I got was "meow meow meow, hiss, spit, meow"

**nemo1ner** · 06-14-2011 06:54 AM

Originally Posted by NastyJettaNza

I tried reading this and all I got was "meow meow meow, hiss, spit, meow"

You forgot bite and scratch.

**dubbin_boho** · 06-14-2011 08:34 PM

**JUS_GT_EYEZ** · 06-15-2011 03:50 PM

**VDubberGolfGirl** · 06-15-2011 04:37 PM

this is one awesome kitteh!!

will be watching this thread. keep up the good work.

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-15-2011 09:10 PM

The hoomin came home from work and didn't even bother to open a can for me. Instead, he went to work on "Gretta" and finished teh seatbeltz.

Soopid hoomin, testing seatbelt while the car is parked. I knows that you need to drive and crash into a wall... or small poodle to test seatbeltz.

The stoopidity got too much and I got bored. I discovered that stubby antennas make for good scratchy-rubz.

I iz going to make this my FaceSpacez profile foto.

**eudorrra** · 06-15-2011 09:18 PM

ha! someone prefers mk3s

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-15-2011 09:26 PM

No, I prefer teh car that stays stayshunariez teh longest.

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-19-2011 06:21 PM

Happy Father's Day. I is waiting for teh other hoomin to come home.

**NyteGTI** · 06-20-2011 01:01 PM

puss you are one awesome cat, in for more luls

**Earlskey** · 06-20-2011 01:39 PM

Hah! I love this thread! At first I thought it was a crazy cat lady thread.

I think I'm going to try and copy you with my fat cat pics.

**eudorrra** · 06-20-2011 01:44 PM

careful, Ranger gets territorial! you may be able to bribe him with kitteh treats and chinny-rubs for a guest post spot though

**nemo1ner** · 06-20-2011 01:53 PM

I love how all the pics have something VW related in the background.

This household has problems.

**eudorrra** · 06-20-2011 11:18 PM

This Just In: his purr sounds like a mk2 diesel

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-21-2011 12:01 AM

Today was filled with teh busy. The boy hoomin was away working on teh mk2.

While he was doing that, the girl hoomin was picking up rare stuffs. I was home accepting teh delivereez.

**bansheelos** · 06-21-2011 08:09 AM

Im subscribed!

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-21-2011 01:00 PM

As long as you are subri...ubskribe....susbrib....reading this, you should send me some kibbles. You takes teh paypals?

**bansheelos** · 06-21-2011 05:52 PM

Originally Posted by Puss N' Boost

As long as you are subri...ubskribe....susbrib....reading this, you should send me some kibbles. You takes teh paypals?

I don't trust the paypals lol its a conspiracy man!

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-24-2011 12:44 PM

The hoomin made a sammich and stepped away for a bit..........

Me thinks the coast is clearz............

NOMONOMONOMONOMONOM!

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-29-2011 10:36 AM

I watched teh hoominz this weekend cleaning teh cars in persperashuns (spellings) for Cult Classic.

Teh Mk2 cleaned up so nicely, I juss had to take another look.

Yesterday, I spent teh day outside with no kibble. Teh hoominz were taking forever getting home.

When I finally got in, I put my Google abilitiez to good use and spotted one of teh hoominz at teh inspekshunz line with teh Gretta.

Now...inspekshunz my litter box!

**Puss N' Boost** · 06-30-2011 06:14 PM

I enjoy teh outdoors. It helps me get in touch with my jungle kitteh instinks, but there are consequensis....like pesky tiks. Luckily, teh girl hoomin gets tehm off meh.

After teh tiks went away, I proceeded outside sneaky-like to see what teh other hoomin was up to.

He waz giving teh cleanings to teh mk3's center console.

Nothing exciting. I is not amused unless I see engine swaps.

**Puss N' Boost** · 07-28-2011 08:52 AM

I stept outside the other day and found another car parkt in teh driveways. Driveways is getting too fuul and effecting my territories.

**This post haz been brought to you by Firefox. I only use teh Firefox to brows the interwebz.

**Puss N' Boost** · 08-02-2011 05:19 PM

Today was too nice to be inside. So while the haus-servants were out making money fer mah kibbles, I was chillaxin' lookin' at teh neighborhood ladies. Had some Summertime on repeat.

**Mosbius Designs** · 08-04-2011 06:02 PM

How fitting is it that one of your state-issued tags has the name 'ALF' in it.

Kitteh must secretly hate that volkswagen.

**nemo1ner** · 08-05-2011 08:29 AM

I do find an increased number of muddy paw prints compared to the other cars in the driveway.

**Fyler1** · 08-06-2011 05:35 PM

This thread is full of win.

VWVortex

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