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    Thread: A man is given tests in life...

    1. Senior Member FlashRedGLS1.8T's Avatar
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      09-19-2011 10:07 PM #36
      Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Roloff View Post
      She comes back totally different and sees different things and I personally feel it is a good idea for us all to be on the same sheet of music.
      Consistency is very important.

      The mom says she won't control what goes on there. So I'm at a loss for words at the moment.


      As a child in a split home, this will never be easy.

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      09-19-2011 10:51 PM #37
      Look at us, debating in two different threads

      I couldn't agree more with the above statements.
      Last edited by Mr. Roloff; 09-19-2011 at 10:54 PM.

    3. Geriatric Member firefighterjunkie's Avatar
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      09-23-2011 04:12 PM #38
      Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Roloff View Post
      GF and I are living together and I see the child almost more than the dad. If thats anyway to put it.

      I would take that stance, but I have been told that I would be backed up on stuff. But just because I took some frosting packs for Toaster Strudels from her this morning, I get my a$$ chewed.

      One of those classic item-gets-taken-run-and-start-crying-when-mommy-is-in-sight moments.

      I've heard the she is only two argument quite a bit but she is pretty smart for 2 and I personally think it is a mixture of getting ZERO discipline from her dad/uncle who spoils her, to coming here and running into a dude that will actually raise a kid and not just watch her run around.
      I've kind of been in your situation, except role reversal. My husband has a child with an ex gf and I met their son when he was just over 2. It was definitely hard, but part of that is the age, and not necessarily the circumstance (although the circumstances don't help). You need to talk to your gf and come up with "acceptable" punishment/reprimand for you to administer to the daughter. You can't always just sit back and let the child do whatever it wants. I mean, I can understand her not wanting you to go overboard, but you should be allowed to put her in time out or something - especially if this is in YOUR house.

      I fully admit, I am not a big fan of the 2 year old age I think once my step son hit 3, things significantly improved and then 4 was even better. I was allowed to remove privileges, and reprimand for bad behavior, and that was it. But, at the same time - that's all that was ever needed.

      Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Roloff View Post
      Sorry for the thread jack, OP.

      I do hear you on that. She just got home from dropping her off at her dad's and I have been running errands all day.

      So we finally talked about how there are two different conflict resolution styles within each home. And I asked her to talk to the child's dad and uncle about how they go about disciplining her. Pretty much asked if there could be some kind of cross communication between homes so that she sees the same thing or as close to the same thing as possible at each house.

      She comes back totally different and sees different things and I personally feel it is a good idea for us all to be on the same sheet of music. The mom says she won't control what goes on there. So I'm at a loss for words at the moment.
      Good luck on getting everyone on the same page. We were never able to do that, unfortunately. I think you are totally on the right wave length though. Sounds like you have more sense than anyone else involved in your situation.

    4. 09-24-2011 12:56 PM #39
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      Apparently, mine will be women.

      Just found out last night that we have another little girl on the way.

      It's gonna make for an estrogen filled house! Wife, Daughter #1 (almost 2), and two female dogs mean pops is seriously outnumbered.

      Wouldn't have it any other way.
      Congrats. You're not alone. My cousin has 7 girls.

    5. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      09-26-2011 07:21 AM #40
      Quote Originally Posted by dr_spock View Post
      Congrats. You're not alone. My cousin has 7 girls.
      My god.

      My whole deal is that I am literally surrounded by women. Here is a list of people who will frequent close FAMILY gatherings like Thanksgiving and Christmas:

      Wife
      Daughter (now with s)
      Dog1
      Dog2
      My Mother (Never knew my father, he left/divorced my mother while she was pregnant)
      My grandmother
      MIL
      SIL
      MIL's three sisters
      Wife's cousin1(female)
      Wife's cousins 2 and 3 (females)

      If I am lucky, wifey will be able to get cousin #4 to come. He's a bmw nut, likes beer, so we get along. Sadly- he is smart and finds a way to avoid the mass gatherings of the estrogen crew. Often these gatherings are held at my home, so I literally have to run away or hide out in the garage to avoid the cackling.

      Oh well, I normally am rewarded by the wifey for putting up with all of the shenanigans.

    6. Senior Member FlashRedGLS1.8T's Avatar
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      09-26-2011 07:31 AM #41
      Quote Originally Posted by firefighterjunkie View Post
      I fully admit, I am not a big fan of the 2 year old age I think once my step son hit 3, things significantly improved and then 4 was even better.
      Trust me...that's not the case with girls. Good luck in 2-7 years.

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      09-26-2011 09:26 AM #42
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      My god.

      My whole deal is that I am literally surrounded by women. Here is a list of people who will frequent close FAMILY gatherings like Thanksgiving and Christmas:

      Wife
      Daughter (now with s)
      Dog1
      Dog2
      My Mother (Never knew my father, he left/divorced my mother while she was pregnant)
      My grandmother
      MIL
      SIL
      MIL's three sisters
      Wife's cousin1(female)
      Wife's cousins 2 and 3 (females)

      If I am lucky, wifey will be able to get cousin #4 to come. He's a bmw nut, likes beer, so we get along. Sadly- he is smart and finds a way to avoid the mass gatherings of the estrogen crew. Often these gatherings are held at my home, so I literally have to run away or hide out in the garage to avoid the cackling.

      Oh well, I normally am rewarded by the wifey for putting up with all of the shenanigans.
      Sounds eerily familiar. Between my daughters, my wife, MIL, her two sisters, the girl cousins, and then whatever of the 5 sisters, 8 girl cousins decide to come to our family functions. It is almost always a 6 -1 girl/guy ratio. Plus my wife owns a hair salon, so I feel like I have another 200 naggy women in my life that I don't even know, but I knwo their stories.

    8. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      09-26-2011 10:46 AM #43
      Quote Originally Posted by Papa Dras View Post
      Sounds eerily familiar. Between my daughters, my wife, MIL, her two sisters, the girl cousins, and then whatever of the 5 sisters, 8 girl cousins decide to come to our family functions. It is almost always a 6 -1 girl/guy ratio. Plus my wife owns a hair salon, so I feel like I have another 200 naggy women in my life that I don't even know, but I knwo their stories.
      HA!

      Often my wife will bring along her 5 closest friends. They've been close since they were all 12 yeasrs old or so, and i've found it quite rare for women to keep that many friends so close for so long...but they get together and are insane (without alcohol...add that, and all bets are OFF).

    9. Member 20DYNAMITE07's Avatar
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      09-26-2011 01:05 PM #44
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      HA!

      Often my wife will bring along her 5 closest friends. They've been close since they were all 12 yeasrs old or so, and i've found it quite rare for women to keep that many friends so close for so long...but they get together and are insane (without alcohol...add that, and all bets are OFF).
      7 way?
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    10. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      11-02-2011 08:52 PM #45
      Quote Originally Posted by FlashRedGLS1.8T View Post
      Trust me...that's not the case with girls. Good luck in 2-7 years.
      So - does the "weepy" stage just continue? I left work early looking forward to an afternoon with the little one while wifey was out and about - - - she's two, what could I possibly be doing to make her so emotional about everything? (the block falling, the crayon falling, the dog licking her at HER request, the book closing, the car rolling andonandonandonandon...

    11. Senior Member FlashRedGLS1.8T's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 07:51 AM #46
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      So - does the "weepy" stage just continue? I left work early looking forward to an afternoon with the little one while wifey was out and about - - - she's two, what could I possibly be doing to make her so emotional about everything? (the block falling, the crayon falling, the dog licking her at HER request, the book closing, the car rolling andonandonandonandon...
      In my experience, it does.

      Our soon to be 8 year old seems to have emotional breakdowns for the oddest reasons. She plays soccer, basketball and does gymnastics and while doing those, she's as hard as a rock. But if she drops a hair clip running up the stairs, that could set her off sitting on the stairs crying for 10 minutes.

      Completely unreasonable and pure emotion.
      It's a freaking mystery to me.

    12. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 09:45 AM #47
      Quote Originally Posted by FlashRedGLS1.8T View Post
      It's a freaking mystery to me.
      Magnets
      Women

      ^^^ How does that **** work?

      According to my wife, the one on the way is a firecraker compared to our 2yo(who I think has quite the personality herself). She says she "wakes up" and starts moving around at the smallest of noises and kicks back at unhappy or loud noises. I'm doomed!

      That's okay - for me the good stuff stacks up way higher than the "bad" or usual stuff so far.
      Last edited by Tornado2dr; 11-03-2011 at 09:51 AM.

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      11-03-2011 09:47 AM #48
      Personally, I find it amusing. Our almost 4 year old girl is tough as nails and as active as they come, so she is always falling and geting bruised up. But, if she messes up a drawing or can't find a doll and the water works begin. I love it. Nothing a hug and a "no big deal" can't fix.

      Did any of us expect having girls to not be complex?

    14. Senior Member FlashRedGLS1.8T's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 09:48 AM #49
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      That's okay - for me the good stuff stacks up way higher than the "bad" or usual stuff so far.
      Oh absolutely, not even close.

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      11-03-2011 10:37 AM #50
      Congrats on the news

      I fear the next couple of years. Stepdaughter is 15, getting into the bitchy phase (I discipline and am such a horrible parent for it )
      Not much in the way of boys thank god, she is such a ***-hag. Yes i use that term with no means of disrespect to her friends.




      Stepson is 17 and is such a shut in i don't have to worry about him getting into trouble....for now
      Yeah, it's an 8v. If I wanted a sporty car, I'd buy an R.

    16. Member titleist1976's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 11:38 AM #51
      Speaking of weepy... my 3 year old lately has been crying just to watch herself cry in the mirror. OMFG. I was so pissed trying to get them to school on time. All she wants is Mom. Well, you know what, little girl. She's not here. But when she is, you can have her. Good grief.

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      11-03-2011 11:41 AM #52
      Quote Originally Posted by titleist1976 View Post
      Speaking of weepy... my 3 year old lately has been crying just to watch herself cry in the mirror.
      I would have to video that

    18. Member titleist1976's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 11:52 AM #53
      She turns and runs now when I break out my phone, camera or video camera. She knows what's up.

    19. Geriatric Member firefighterjunkie's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 11:52 AM #54
      Quote Originally Posted by titleist1976 View Post
      Speaking of weepy... my 3 year old lately has been crying just to watch herself cry in the mirror. OMFG. I was so pissed trying to get them to school on time. All she wants is Mom. Well, you know what, little girl. She's not here. But when she is, you can have her. Good grief.
      My dad said I used to do that...cry and then go look at myself crying. I also remember being sent to my room to cry, but then sneaking into the hallway so that people could hear me better. Eventually I would get sympathy.

      I know I was a huge cry baby from like 6-12, but then seemed to out grow it as an teen/adult. I really don't cry much now unless something is really bothering me.

    20. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 12:05 PM #55
      Quote Originally Posted by firefighterjunkie View Post
      I really don't cry much now unless something is really bothering me.
      Crying is a waste of electrolytes and water. You don't want to be wasteful of our natural resources, do you?

      I did say this to my wife once, in an attempt to get her to laugh I got punched.

      I have also said this in the soothing parent voice trying to get my little girl to calm down one night. My wife says I'm mean.

    21. Senior Member FlashRedGLS1.8T's Avatar
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      11-03-2011 01:34 PM #56
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      Crying is a waste of electrolytes and water. You don't want to be wasteful of our natural resources, do you?

      I did say this to my wife once, in an attempt to get her to laugh I got punched.
      Haha, that's funny. I've thought about using the old "If you want to cry...I'll give you something to cry about" phrase on my kids but everything it enters my head it brings back my childhood, so I don't use it.

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      11-03-2011 01:59 PM #57
      Quote Originally Posted by Papa Dras View Post
      Personally, I find it amusing. Our almost 4 year old girl is tough as nails and as active as they come, so she is always falling and geting bruised up. But, if she messes up a drawing or can't find a doll and the water works begin. I love it. Nothing a hug and a "no big deal" can't fix.

      Did any of us expect having girls to not be complex?
      THIS.

      That was so me growing up. it was so nice to have a great dad too. sounds like you are one of them. my parents raised 3 girls and 4 boys. it was like living in a hurricane. everyone was so different too, from the sports we liked, the sports we played, the music we listened to. my parents are amazing. i dont know how good parents do it....
      Oh, Hai IG: @bethisloco

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      11-04-2011 02:22 PM #58
      As I've said before in this thread... Wait until your daughters are teenagers!! Mine will be 17 in April.
      And if love remains, though everything is lost, we will pay the price but will not count the cost. -Neil Peart
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      12-06-2011 05:56 PM #59
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      Magnets
      Women

      ^^^ How does that **** work?

      According to my wife, the one on the way is a firecraker compared to our 2yo(who I think has quite the personality herself). She says she "wakes up" and starts moving around at the smallest of noises and kicks back at unhappy or loud noises.:laugh: I'm doomed!

      That's okay - for me the good stuff stacks up way higher than the "bad" or usual stuff so far.
      HAHA!!! I used to clap next to my wife when she was pregnant with our first girl and it would make that baby kick her so hard. So frikkin funny.......for me.

      I now have two girls (2 and 5) and I cant imagine life any other way. Some times I think its the mystery that gets me going in the morning. And as for dating, not even god will be able to protect the boy who breaks my babys heart.
      [IMG][/IMG]
      Last edited by sortadelux; 12-06-2011 at 05:59 PM.
      "Never attribute to maliciousness that which can be attributed to stupidity."

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      12-07-2011 09:52 AM #60
      Beautiful family.

    26. Member sortadelux's Avatar
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      12-07-2011 03:32 PM #61
      Thanks! They get it from her.
      "Never attribute to maliciousness that which can be attributed to stupidity."

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      12-10-2011 11:31 AM #62
      Congratulations! I'm in the opposite boat. Husband, 18 month old son, 2 male dogs. We just recently got a female dog to balance it out.
      Believe nothing you hear, and only half of what you see.

    28. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      01-10-2012 06:32 PM #63
      Woah.

      March 3rd (likely sooner) is fast approaching. Just had a "3D" ultrasound last night, might post pictures of the little goober(much less alien like, now) if it isn't going to offend anyone. How do they fold up like that in there?

      Damn. I need to start getting less sleep and start throwing money out the window at babies r us on the way home to get prepared for what is to come.

    29. Member titleist1976's Avatar
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      01-10-2012 07:00 PM #64
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      Woah.

      Damn. I need to start getting less sleep and start throwing money out the window at babies r us on the way home to get prepared for what is to come.
      I was just listening to some baby cry for the last hour and a half of my life... the kid wasn't mine either. Good luck, buddy!

    30. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      01-11-2012 05:23 AM #65
      Quote Originally Posted by titleist1976 View Post
      I was just listening to some baby cry for the last hour and a half of my life... the kid wasn't mine either. Good luck, buddy!
      Does not compute.

      I don't listen to other people's children fuss, and I wouldn't want someone to listen to mine!

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      01-11-2012 10:11 AM #66
      Quote Originally Posted by Tornado2dr View Post
      Does not compute.

      I don't listen to other people's children fuss, and I wouldn't want someone to listen to mine!
      ...and then you woke up

    32. Member Tornado2dr's Avatar
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      01-11-2012 10:36 AM #67
      Quote Originally Posted by Papa Dras View Post
      ...and then you woke up
      It's my dream and i'll wake up when I damn well please.

    33. Member titleist1976's Avatar
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      01-11-2012 11:43 AM #68
      I was at my daughter's gymnastics practice. Fussy little guy was being babysat by her aunty, while her own kid was at practice too. She got up a few times to try to sooth him, but the little guy was teething and couldn't fall asleep.

    34. Senior Member FlashRedGLS1.8T's Avatar
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      01-11-2012 12:15 PM #69
      So funny, but over the last 3 months my 7 year old has matured quite a bit.
      Much less fussing.
      Much less princess crap.
      She approaches things differently.
      Refreshing and puts me at ease a lot more.

      I'm sure in the next few months to year, she'll revert back to full on crazy.

      As far as the baby coming, tornado, good luck. March is here almost.

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      01-11-2012 01:27 PM #70
      Quote Originally Posted by titleist1976 View Post
      I was at my daughter's gymnastics practice. Fussy little guy was being babysat by her aunty, while her own kid was at practice too. She got up a few times to try to sooth him, but the little guy was teething and couldn't fall asleep.
      I don't know a single parent that didn't become both more sympathetic to parents that are trying and more agitated with parents that aren't once they had their own. Obviously, everyone thinks they are doing things the right way, but there is a pretty general common sense feeling that most parents have implanted into their brains as soon as the sight of their own child happens.

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