Newborn Babies: Crib-Sleeping or Co-Sleeping?

[salsanacho]

You still sleep in the same bed as your 3.5 year old child?

Yup! it's great.

[VdubGoddess]

Our son slept in a bassinet until he was 6 weeks old next to our bed. A few times in the first 6 weeks I would have to hold him. He is adopted and came with a few issues so having him sleep on me helped soothe him, again I did this less than a handful of times. He went into his crib at 6 weeks and started sleeping through the night at about 12 weeks old. Even now that he is almost a year I don't like to sleep with him. My husband will sometimes take a nap with him and I tell him I don't want him to get use to it.

[Papa Dras]

3.5yo.

That sounds very odd. Do you actually think this is a good thing, or do you do it because you like it?

[salsanacho]

That sounds very odd. Do you actually think this is a good thing, or do you do it because you like it?

Actually both, I'd say it's good for the kid and I enjoy it, so it's a no-brainer for me. While there are plenty of articles espousing the benefits of cosleeping, ultimately it just seems like a much more normal way of raising a child imo. Kids were designed to want to have their parents close to them, I see no reason to go against nature in that area. Folks here in the US tend to stress the whole "child independence" thing and I'm of the opinion that it should be child driven vs parent driven. Eventually, I'm pretty confident that my kid will want her own bed, I'm happy to let her work towards that on her own terms.

[Skrying87]

Personally I wish my girlfriend had our son crib-sleeping sooner because Co sleeping just is unsafe(i almost rolled over on him) and gets your child too attached to you.

[Diamond Dave]

Just wondering what you guys did with your newborns as far as sleeping goes? I know there are very split opinions on this topic.

Our first was in a bassinet near the bed for almost 11mos, then in the bed. The second one was mostly in the bed. It was MUCH easier on me with them sleeping in the bed and my wife even said she slept much better without the need to get up, go get them, breast feed in a chair, then go back to the bassinet, then get in bed.

It is my opinion that people that think "you'll never get them out of your bed" are weak willed. Newborns need human touch; their skin is their single largest sensory organ at that age.

[lonewolf]

That sounds very odd. Do you actually think this is a good thing, or do you do it because you like it?

You do realize that in many other countries around the world, this is quite a common practice right? In US however independence (for good or bad) is stressed very heavily from the get go and hence this.

[Papa Dras]

And? There are a lot of things practiced in the world that has no bearing on anything, so I don't get the point.

In the end, I couldn't care less what you do in your home and how you choose to raise your child. I think we have long ago shown that there are many schools of thought to everything. We do what we think is right and you do what you think is right.

The fact remains that I think it is very odd to have a child that is nearly preschool age still sleeping with you. Then again, we know freaky parents that still think you should breast feed a 2 year old.

[salsanacho]

Then again, we know freaky parents that still think you should breast feed a 2 year old.

Actually, that sounds like a good set of parents to me.

[Papa Dras]

Well, of course it does. I just come from the school of thought that when the kid can ask for the tit, they are too old to be getting it.

[Tornado2dr]

Well, of course it does. I just come from the school of thought that when the kid can ask for the tit, they are too old to be getting it.

I come from the same school - even though I know that it represents a conflict of interest when I ask for them all the time.

[lonewolf]

And? There are a lot of things practiced in the world that has no bearing on anything, so I don't get the point.

In the end, I couldn't care less what you do in your home and how you choose to raise your child. I think we have long ago shown that there are many schools of thought to everything. We do what we think is right and you do what you think is right.

The fact remains that I think it is very odd to have a child that is nearly preschool age still sleeping with you. Then again, we know freaky parents that still think you should breast feed a 2 year old.

Right and likewise nobody cares what you do either. Point is its not like your way is right or the other way is right. Both methods have worked just fine.

And yet you keep pushing your opinion as a "fact" that it is odd for a preschool kid to sleep with parents. Pretty narrow view there I say.

[Papa Dras]

Do you live in a box? My opinion is a widely believed one, I just happen to express it well, so I choose to. Also, there has never been any attempt to state this as "fact", but you are obviously hurt over my stance so you decided to try to make it appear that way for a better argument.

Go ahead and sleep with your preschool aged kids, it doesn't matter...for now.

[lonewolf]

Do you live in a box? My opinion is a widely believed one, I just happen to express it well, so I choose to. Also, there has never been any attempt to state this as "fact", but you are obviously hurt over my stance so you decided to try to make it appear that way for a better argument.

You comments again just validates my point that you view things in only your "box" as widely viewed and have no clue how others may view (which BTW could very well be a more wider view). And this thread is about everybody's "opinion" the last time I checked.

Anyways this is a stalemate and no point in me commenting any more - especially if somebody has a preset view.

T

[Papa Dras]

and dot dot dot.

[titleist1976]

If you look at the poll results, Dras' opinion is widely viewed and practiced. I'm sure your kids will be just fine. As will his.

Serious question, Lonewolf (or any co-sleepers)- When do you plan on ending that arrangement? At what point do you say, "okay... this kid needs to sleep in their own room." Kids are mean, man. I'd imagine if one of their classmates finds out that they still sleep with mom and dad, they will be teased until high school graduation.

[lonewolf]

If you look at the poll results, Dras' opinion is widely viewed and practiced. I'm sure your kids will be just fine. As will his.

Serious question, Lonewolf (or any co-sleepers)- When do you plan on ending that arrangement? At what point do you say, "okay... this kid needs to sleep in their own room." Kids are mean, man. I'd imagine if one of their classmates finds out that they still sleep with mom and dad, they will be teased until high school graduation.

So who's the sample audience to determine the poll validity?

That said, I don't have my kids sleep in our room. I was just stating a worldly state of things and not just US centric when I say that in other countries (e.g. Asia, that has way more population than US and also kids sleeping in parent's room a possible result of that) it is not necessarily the same.

[woofster]

Our first was in a bassinet near the bed for almost 11mos, then in the bed. The second one was mostly in the bed. It was MUCH easier on me with them sleeping in the bed and my wife even said she slept much better without the need to get up, go get them, breast feed in a chair, then go back to the bassinet, then get in bed.

It is my opinion that people that think "you'll never get them out of your bed" are weak willed. Newborns need human touch; their skin is their single largest sensory organ at that age.

Well that's the thing, you read pros and cons for each and I appreciate both for their advantages as well as disadvantages. At the end of the day, it almost seems like it doesn't make a difference.

We put our little one in the crib when it's official sleep time. Do we have him in our bed at times? Sure. During the day, he'll sleep in our arms or on the couch, whichever works at the time.

[firefighterjunkie]

I would be interested in knowing the breakdown of formula feeding vs. breastfeeding between the two sleeping categories. I think we'd probably find that formula or bottle feeders tend to crib sleep from the start, while breastfeeders tend to co-sleep. It makes sense to co-sleep when breastfeeding since babies often nurse more frequently and it's easy to just grab the baby and attach them without getting out of bed. If you formula or bottle feed, you have to get up out of bed anyway, so its less hassle to go to a crib or separate sleeping area (because you already have to get up to make the bottle).

[FATMANnaLILCAR]

The wife breast feeds, my first kid crib slept since she was 4 months old. Our 1.5 year old still invades our bed every night between 1 and 3 am. I think you should do what works for you. Every family is different and every child has different needs. I am soooo sick of this "ONE SIZE FITS ALL" crap. Again>>> DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU!<<<

[woofster]

The wife breast feeds, my first kid crib slept since she was 4 months old. Our 1.5 year old still invades our bed every night between 1 and 3 am. I think you should do what works for you. Every family is different and every child has different needs. I am soooo sick of this "ONE SIZE FITS ALL" crap. Again>>> DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU!<<<

+1 to that. As new parents, my wife and I read and hear so many different things from family, friends, books, online articles, co-workers, etc. that it really complicates things. There is no one solution, that I have definitely learned!

[ModestGirl]

Every kid is different. My first was sleeping in my bed with me until she was 3 and it was a struggle to get her in her own bed - totally my fault. My second slept in a bassinet near the bed from day one so I could just hop up and feed her. She never slept in our bed, and won't even nap with me. Our bed means it's time to play and not sleep. So unless I want my eyes gouged out in my sleep, she stays in her crib. The older one (8) still wants to sleep in my bed. Hell to the no little child.

Different strokes for different folks. If you do co-sleep, make sure you take precautions to be safe. There are several products out there that make co-sleeping a great and safe thing. I can't imagine waking up having smothered your infant...horrible.

[Papa Dras]

I can't imagine waking up having smothered your infant...horrible.

That's an understatement if I ever heard one.

[VdubChaos]

Actually both, I'd say it's good for the kid and I enjoy it, so it's a no-brainer for me. While there are plenty of articles espousing the benefits of cosleeping, ultimately it just seems like a much more normal way of raising a child imo. Kids were designed to want to have their parents close to them, I see no reason to go against nature in that area. Folks here in the US tend to stress the whole "child independence" thing and I'm of the opinion that it should be child driven vs parent driven. Eventually, I'm pretty confident that my kid will want her own bed, I'm happy to let her work towards that on her own terms.

All of my children slept with us until 4-5 years old.

Switching to their own room/bed was a piece of cake, just requires consistency and little tough love.

[dunhamjr]

our plan is to crib sleep.

i dont even think we are going to do a bassinet in our room to start off with.

[VdubChaos]

Your plan will change

[ModestGirl]

Your plan will change

This is parenting.

[audiphile]

Co-sleeping is something that's always kind of bugged me out, and I wondered if being a parent would change my perspective (as it has proven to for a few topics). In conclusion, it has not... our daughter is 10 months now and I can't imagine co-sleeping. We've had a couple rough teething nights that we ended up having her in our bed and it was not for us.

That's not to say that it's inherently wrong... I am a firm believer that all kids are different, whether it's nature or nurture is irrelevant. You've gotta do what works for you.

[Tornado2dr]

You've gotta do what works for you.

Yup. Daughter #2 is sleeping almost thru the night (7 hrs is pretty darn good) at 1 month in her crib.

I preach to my friends....schedulescheduleschedule for dinner and bedtime stuff , and you'll end up with longer and quieter nights and happier babies.

[firefighterjunkie]

Your plan will change

Okay, I gotta agree with this.

I wouldn't want to be getting up and going into another room every 1.5 hrs to change a diaper, feed the baby, burp the baby (took my daughter almost 20 minutes to burp or she would puke everywhere), get the baby back to sleep...only to start all over again once you finally fall asleep.