What did you do this time, Chilledman?
Who's gone through it .
How did you break the news that you wanted out ?
Not what I have done, what I want to do.
Been married for 12+ years ( since I was 20 )
And just 0 intrest in it any more , along with realizing the Religion / Cult I used to be with is a load of crap , I feel that I need 100% change in my life right now.
I think getting married at 20 adds more complexity than I would understand. I'm sure there are people here that got married super young and lost a lot of their best years. JK
Also, if you were married while in a religion/cult, then there is another level. I wouldn't feel bad about just being honest and letting her know that my life is completely different now and I need to move on. You know, the old it's not you, it's me talk.
Also while doing this I will end up alienating all my friends and family due to there Religious brain washing.
TL;DR - Basicly bailing on everyone and everything and starting over.
So more so to the woman , how would you want the news told to you by your significant other ?
We have know each other for almost 20 years , and if its this bad now .....
- I personally view its time to get out when she goes on a trip and you hope the plane crashes .....
-Will be back in a week or so going to quit my job now and the laptop is theres so ...
Leave some ideas !
Last edited by Chilledman; 01-30-2012 at 10:48 AM.
And with.the new job now.
W with 60% + travel. And a non religious friend of mine with a open room this is the prime time to exscape .
Trying to find the best way to break it to her more or less ....
- logged.my phone in its worse typing on here then my laptop .....
Lol actually my spelling should be better since my phone autocorrects everything.
I think I am just going to go with .
It's.not you its me we have grown apart since I have changed.who I am and what I want in life over the last few years .
. Is near the spacebar ....
when did you quit buying into the religious stuff? did OT lead you into the Darkside?
bwahahaha, personally I'd rather lol with the sinners than cry with the saints...
I'm sure bringing up the discussion of divorce is going to be difficult, maybe drink a *little* beforehand, not too much though, haha
This is why it's better to not get hitched in the 20s and just chill. When you look at love in your 20s, it felt so right and so perfect. Now you look back, it was so spur of the moment and so reckless and that's what made it feel so good.
I think ultimately Marriages should have an expiration date so people can plan for an eventual separation or extension if things are working out.
The person you marry should be someone that you are hiring to become your business partner. They have to fit your purpose in life and have the ability to complement your attributes.
She is an awesome person and very helpful and willing to do most anything for me .
But the relgion.thing is a huge issue and who wants a pretty much sexless life either ?
She makes a great friend but a ****ty lover .
And right now I just really want someone to burry into the mattress right now
It's shallow I know but I have been there and done the rest I want something different .
But seriously I personally never bought into it ever its something that I just did for everyone else and now with the new job and just comming to the simple relazation that its all bs , I have a short time here I want to enjoy that time I have left.
That and its something that has been back there since I was.17 and finally.now able to act on it .
Plus with the job and away every other week I know I won't be faithful and I would rather leave before I cheat on her.
I personally.respect. her to much to do that to her .
She needs someone else that is more family and more religious oriented then I will ever be.
Divorce sucks, whether you wanted it or not. Plan to be angry as all hell at the crap she's going to put you through because "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" You better be trying to hide that $20k because she or a lawyer is going to end up with it.
You know why divorce is so expensive? Because it's ****ing worth it!
Or, you can try to work it out with her first. Try marriage counseling. Although, I would never have married a Jehovah's Witness
Marriage....I'd commit suicide before marrying her.
Unfortunately I know some people that have also been in your situation. They got married very early, tried their best to make things work and realized they're a different person x amount of years later. Only other piece of advice I can give you is to do it now. Don't waste anymore time and emotion (on both sides). Good luck sir
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, just not their own facts.
It was never my thing ever and has always been a thorn in my side , I never fit in never believed it and never understood the need for it either . That and personality wise I don't belong at all .
It's just taken this much time to read others view points on them and mine were the same long before.
Some people need someone or something else as a reason.to. live , I don't I live for the thrill of the day month or year .
I don't need my reason to live is due some douche is having a pissing.match with some other douche of who's cooler , if they are acutally there , there worst then Politicians since there both happy to watch us suffer while doing not a thing . fck em both
There both selfish *******s .
Last edited by Chilledman; 02-01-2012 at 04:59 PM.
Just be honest with her. And make sure she knows that you aren't interested in reconciling or working things through, otherwise you'll just lead her on.
Maybe she's been questioning her decision to marry you as well and due to religion won't be the one to initiate the divorce?
My best friend is mormon and married a mormon guy when they were 21...after 5+ years he decided he didn't want to live that lifestyle anymore and they had a big heart to heart and they amicably divorced without attorneys. She wanted to continue her religious lifestyle, he didn't, so they came to the agreement that they were better off separate. *shrug* They are still friends now, and live completely different types of lifestyles.
She needs someone there all the time where I need someone there once and great while , and being married for so long its driving me nuts.
Sorry to hear about this Chilledman...
But if it's the right thing to do then it's the right thing to do.
Keep us posted!
BTW...i'm curious, which "cult" were you in?
Good luck dude!
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