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Thread: Dad Sews his Kid's Butt Shut - Gets Probation!

  1. Banned Der Schaltwerks's Avatar
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    05-15-2012 06:41 PM #1
    A north suburban Waukegan man took a plea deal that kept him out of prison for an incident in which he took a needle and thread to his son’s buttocks.

    Randy Swopes, 52, represented himself in court Friday to accept a plea deal that sentenced him to 24 months of probation and 250 hours of public service.



    http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2012/05/...sons-buttocks/

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    05-15-2012 06:44 PM #2
    was there a "reason" the father did this????
    Larry

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    05-15-2012 06:45 PM #3
    Quote Originally Posted by .LSinLV. View Post
    was there a "reason" the father did this????
    no butt = no gay?
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    05-15-2012 06:46 PM #4
    Quote Originally Posted by .LSinLV. View Post
    was there a "reason" the father did this????
    Yes. His kid had chrohns disease and an anal fistula. His dad figured sewing his bung hole shut should fix things.

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    05-15-2012 06:49 PM #5
    Way to set a misleading tone for the thread, Opie.

    The father was (negligently) trying to treat the son's fistula.
    Sim Simmer.
    Keys.
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    05-15-2012 06:53 PM #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Big M View Post
    Way to set a misleading tone for the thread, Opie.

    The father was (negligently) trying to treat the son's fistula.

    Ah ha!

    You said you have me on Ignore, you filthy LIAR !!!

    He who cries wolf on using Ignore can never be taken seriously.

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    05-15-2012 07:03 PM #7
    An anal fistula is a communicating tract between the inner anus or rectum and the external skin surrounding the anus.

    It begins as a superficial ulcer that becomes infected creating an anal abscess that subsequently bursts leaving a communicating tract between the internal anus and the external skin of the perianal region.

    It causes a chronic discharge of pus that typically has an offensive odor.



  8. 05-15-2012 07:22 PM #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Der Schaltwerks View Post
    It causes a chronic discharge of pus that typically has an offensive odor.
    This alone could be SO many things.
    Quote Originally Posted by DIAF
    Mass murders are so statistically insignificant that they should not be used as a basis for any policy, particularly any policy that would infringe on individual rights.

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    05-15-2012 07:44 PM #9
    Quote Originally Posted by dubraycer36 View Post
    This alone could be SO many things.
    Not when it pours out your second butt hole.

    It can only be one thing.

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    05-15-2012 08:19 PM #10
    One thing's for sure. That kid was a real pain in the ass.

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    05-15-2012 09:20 PM #11
    Wow, probation - I love this freaking country

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    05-15-2012 09:38 PM #12
    Sew his ass shut so he'll **** spaghetti
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    05-16-2012 12:04 AM #13
    WTF??? I have Crohn's and have had this surgery twice. This makes me want to beat that guy!!!!!
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    05-16-2012 02:00 AM #14
    gnarly
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    05-16-2012 02:07 AM #15
    Actual quote from the article.

    The teenage boy had a fistula in his butt and his father opted to sew it shut
    Butt.

    Also, what a strange sad relationship this father and son have.
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    You are in the land of rust and honey.

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    05-16-2012 03:28 AM #16
    What an as$hole!


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    05-16-2012 05:32 AM #17
    Quote Originally Posted by LeftoverCrack View Post
    What an as$hole!


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  18. 05-16-2012 10:50 AM #18
    he shut that ass up!

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    05-16-2012 10:55 AM #19
    dad was listening to wu-tang, wasn't he?

    (46sec in)

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    05-16-2012 10:57 AM #20
    I'm going to blame all of the anti-gay media,

    if COD makes kids shoot people, then Santorum influences the butt hem
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    05-16-2012 10:57 AM #21
    Quote Originally Posted by twerked View Post
    dad was listening to wu-tang, wasn't he?

    (46sec in)
    Fist thing I thought of.

    And that medical issue sounds ****ty in many ways.

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    05-16-2012 11:14 AM #22
    My wife has Crohn's. She had a fistula a few years ago. She woke up screaming in the middle of the night and said it felt like she had just been stabbed. At 2am, we got in the car and rushed her to the hospital. She had emergency surgery, was in the hospital for more than a week with constant IV antibiotics and painkillers, and was on a cocktail of powerful oral antibiotics (flagyll, cipro, etc) for the next month or so. She said it was one of the most painful things she's ever experienced --- not just the actual fistula, but the surgery and recovery as well. I think it's reasonable to say that she would have been lucky not to die if we had just tried to do some home surgery.

    I don't know how this kid wasn't taken from his father. It's nothing short of abuse to do what he did. And representing yourself in court? He's a real DIY guy apparently

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    05-16-2012 01:03 PM #23
    When I worked in health insurance we used to have to get pictures of conditions for pre-authorizations.....not a fun time opening the mail and seeing pictures of fistulas, hemmorroids and the sort. Horribly true story
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    05-16-2012 01:06 PM #24
    This came to mind:

    MKV | MKIV | AWhiteRabbit| perfect.

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    05-16-2012 01:10 PM #25
    ...Merica.
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