Lets start this one off here:
3 vampires walk into a bar.
The 1st one sits and orders a glass of hot blood, the 2nd sits and orders a glass of cold blood.
When the 3rd one sits down she orders a glass of hot water.
The bartender questions why the vampire would order hot water instead of blood. She reaches down and pulls out a tampon and says, "I want tea."
A little boy sits on Santa's lap. Santa says "I bet I know what you want for
Christmas," and with his finger he taps the boys nose with every letter he
The little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have enough toys."
Santa replies once again tapping the boys nose with every letter,
Again the little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have all kinds of
"Well what would you like for Christmas?" Santa asks.
The little boy replies, tapping Santa on the nose,
"P-U-S-S-Y, and don't tell me you don't have any because I can smell it on